Category Archives: Uncategorized

Becoming Me: Being Loved

Phew, it’s been a while. I’ve struggled persuading myself to vlog, and kept putting it off in case I did manage. There will be more in the future, but I think its time to accept that most of the time I’m just happier typing!

Friends, I’ve been busy. I got engaged, and just moved in with my partner!

Some other stuff too but let’s stick with that for now, because it’s what I want to talk about.

I’ve talked before about never really identifying with being a lesbian or a butch. For the longest time I didn’t know what I was, because nothing seemed to fit.

I was only occasionally attracted to people, and when I was, it was usually to a woman who identified as straight. I learned by getting my heart broken for the first time at 16 that it was best to keep that quiet, so I did. Never being attracted to someone until I got to know them meant learning how to do that unselfishly – in the end, I learned to accept it, and just make a friend instead. Continue reading

Becoming Me: The Next Fight

Stress is stressful, people. And it sucks.

After months of chasing things down and chasing people up and fighting red tape, I finally got the letter which asked my GP to begin hormone treatment. So for, like, a day, I was a happy little transmasculine dude. It was lovely. I got a whole night of sleep and everything.

One week later, and I’ve found myself back to the having same conversation again, just with new people:

“Hi there, did you do the thing yet?”
“We did not do the thing yet.”
“Please do the thing. I’ll call again tomorrow.”

Continue reading